What’s it like to be: Helping teenagers with a mental health crisis

What’s It Like To Be is a fortnightly column in which New Zealanders from all walks of life share first-hand experiences. Here, Paulette Crowley hears from psychologist Sophia Dawson about working with young people dealing with depression and mental health challenges, and what parents and caregivers can do to help teens navigate tough times.

WARNING: This article discusses suicide, depression and mental health issues.

I knew I wanted to be a psychologist when I was 15. I was so curious about the human mind and human behaviour, and I just wanted to understand them a bit better. I was one of those teenagers who wanted to be a mentor and be in a role of supporting others, particularly through tricky times… I knew I’d end up working with teens.

Six months after registering as a psychologist, I moved to the United Kingdom and ended up working in an adolescent inpatient unit in London for a year. It was one of the most powerful experiences I’ve had as a psychologist.

More often than not, the teenagers residing there had tried to take their own lives, and/or had severe mental health challenges, and therefore they needed to be hospitalised to keep them safe. We developed really strong relationships with the teens who lived on the ward. They were like our kids in a way – we worked where they lived – and so mixed in with therapy would be playing board games and baking.

A few years ago, I moved back home to New Zealand and started my own practice, Bloomers Psychology, again working with adolescents and adults. It really feels like there’s a lot happening in the world at the moment that isn’t conducive to mental wellness for our teens.

I’m only 15 or so years older than some of the teens, but this generation feels different to when I was younger. Now, if your friends go to a party that you’re not invited to, they post about it online and you see it straight away, and you can understandably feel a sense of rejection. There’s also a real problem with our urgency culture – we’re always contactable and expected to be “on” at all times.

Our young people are growing up in a tricky generation. They have instant access to the worst things that are happening in the world – wars, dreadful diseases, accidents and disasters – at their fingertips, on their phones. There’s also so much comparison able to take place with social media – people looking a certain way, with certain achievements and access to certain material things.

The pandemic and lockdowns are still affecting young people. I work with many teens who struggled with being isolated from their peers, or experienced disruption to their learning as a result of the lockdowns, and now anxiety or depression is getting in the way of them getting back to school. Quite often, a health school or third party has to support them back into school or into correspondence learning.